


Stars

by avampireandhercupcake



Category: Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Gen, Presumed Dead, cameo by Winn and Eliza
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-03
Updated: 2016-05-03
Packaged: 2018-06-06 01:56:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,459
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6733279
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/avampireandhercupcake/pseuds/avampireandhercupcake
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"Suddenly the darkness felt darker, and Alex couldn’t look at the stars any longer."  </p>
<p>Alex couldn't pilot the pod to Kara.  Supergirl saved the world, but no one was left to save her.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Stars

**Author's Note:**

> As almost always, song inspired. I did cry a time or two on this one.

It was a suicide mission, and Kara made sure she knew.

 

But god, she hadn’t given her a _fucking choice._

 

How could Kara make her promise to live a happy life without her, when she was everything?

 

_The pod, the pod.  I’ve got to make the pod work._

 

Head throbbing in agony, Alex dashed over to the alien spacecraft, relying on the meager strength she could muster to unlatch it.  But now what?  There didn’t happen to be an owner’s manual in the glove box (there was no glove box, for that matter) and if there had been one it’d surely be in Kryptonese.

 

Between fiddling with the only couple of buttons on the dashboard and trying to pry it open completely, she felt her headache disappear.

 

_She did it_ .  She felt pride well up in her chest, followed by a sinking feeling in her gut.   _No one’s there to save her._

 

Alex worked at double speed, her fumbling turning into smashing on the console and coming no closer to powering what she knew was her only shot.

 

“Agent Danvers,” Alex heard a quiet voice call.  She ignored it.

 

“Agent Danvers!” the voice repeated, louder.  Still Alex continued to thrash about the pod.

 

“Alex, stand down!”  Alex finally turned her head to Lucy Lane, whose tearful eyes were rimmed with red.

 

“Like hell,” she replied angrily.  “I’m supposed to protect her and I’m going to get her.”

 

“Alex, that pod hasn’t been used in almost thirteen years and nobody, not even Kara, knows how it worked,” Lucy said gently.

 

“Well then go ask the damn hologram,” Alex bit out, exasperated.  “I’m going to save my sister!”

 

“The ship won’t fly, Alex!”

 

“Then send something else after her!  Go chum up to one of your military pals and send a rocket for her!  She’s not dying!”  Her Myriad-induced headache was quickly being replaced by the spasmodic pains of her mania, and Lucy watched as Alex turned red and her breaths came in spurts.  Hesitantly, she went up to Alex and placed a hand on her shoulder.  Alex flinched away.

 

“God, get off me Lane.  Why aren’t you doing something?  Why aren’t _any of you_ doing something?”

 

All of the staff of the DEO, plus Maxwell Lord, had their eyes on the pair of them.  Alex looked to Max, eyes pleading for some support.

 

“I’m sorry, Agent Danvers,” he said, his face uncharacteristically somber.  “The odds...for once, I wish I’d been wrong.”

 

Alex’s face twisted up even more and she threw a crushing punch to the useless spacecraft.  Lucy stared as Alex’s knuckles began to bruise almost immediately, then gazed back at her agent, secretly grateful she hadn’t been on the receiving end.

 

“Alex,” a deep voice echoed quietly from the edge of the room.  J’onn J’onzz emerged, painfully alone, and Alex’s rage doubled.

 

“Why. Didn’t. You. Save. Her.” Alex bit out.

 

“Alex, he’s been badly injured.  He wouldn’t have survived the journey she made,” Lucy remarked carefully.

 

“If it would’ve saved her, I don’t care!” she screamed.

 

“You don’t mean that,” Lucy said, shaking her head.

 

Alex charged at J’onn and started punching, kicking, shoving, anything she could do.  J’onn stood there and took it, feeling only the smallest twinges of pain after facing far worse over the last days.  The heartache he felt was a different story.

 

After about thirty seconds of this, Alex seemed to tire herself out and instead of assaulting him, she threw her arms around him and began to sob.  He wrapped his arms around her protectively and let his own tears fall, the mourning period beginning for yet another daughter.

 

All of the DEO hung their heads in front of of a broken family.

 

* * *

  


As National City recovered from Myriad, the news outlets began to report that Supergirl had been spotted lifting a large structure into the atmosphere, but nobody had seen her return.

 

J’onn had come into the barracks where Alex had supposedly been sent to sleep, but she had merely stared blankly at the gray ceiling.  She meant to call Eliza, but she couldn’t stomach the thought of speaking to her.  

 

J’onn asked her to come with him, that he wanted someone they could trust to be the first to break the news.  She had looked at him miserably, but nodded.  He kissed her head and they left for the outside.

 

Alex knew Winn had spotted her and looked at her strangely as she and J’onn got off the elevator and brushed past to Cat Grant’s office, but she didn’t return the glance.  She could barely keep it together as it was.

 

Cat looked up over two pairs of glasses as they pushed through the glass doors.  “Mulder. Scully. I’d ask if we have an appointment, but my assistant seems to be M.I.A, so I presume not.”

 

Alex bit her lip and clenched and relaxed her fist.  Thankfully, J’onn took care of the talking.

 

“Ms. Grant, we’re sorry to drop in unannounced, but I think you’ll want to hear what we have to say,” he said solemnly.

 

Cat stiffened at this, then removed both pairs of lenses and eyed J’onn carefully.  “This is about Supergirl, isn’t it.”  He nodded.  “Nobody knows what happened to her.  I assume the ‘FBI,’”, she made a big show of air quotes,  “has an idea.”

 

Alex shuffled her feet as J’onn continued.

 

“The same alien technology that was used to control the minds of the people of National City was adapted by one of its creators to be fatal.  This time, I believe you were not immune.”

 

Cat remembered the agonizing pain in her head hours prior that had her and all of her staff writhing on the floor.  “You are correct.”

 

“Supergirl could not disable the program before it would deal its deadly blow.  The only remaining option was to carry the entire facility in which it was housed far enough away from the Earth to lose the signal.  Unfortunately this required her to leave the atmosphere where she would be unable to generate the thrust necessary to fly back down,” J’onn finished.

 

Cat stared at him as if in wait.  “And that’s it?  She’s just...not coming back?”  Alex closed her eyes.

 

“She can’t come back, Ms. Grant.  And without oxygen, even with her powers...she couldn’t have lasted long.”

 

“It _was_ a damn suicide note,” Cat mumbled under her breath.  Exhaling sharply, she looked between the two of them and cautiously asked, “So to be sure, you’re confirming...Supergirl is dead.”

 

“We’ve come to you because we trust that you will handle the story with the utmost care and discretion.  Thank you for your service, Ms. Grant,” J’onn replied, and the two turned to leave.

 

“Wait,” Cat called out.  “If I could have a moment alone with...Scully here.”

 

Alex turned to J’onn with a blank look, but he nodded.  He walked out and Alex remained, facing Cat at her desk.

 

“I...I am truly sorry, Agent Danvers.  About your sister…”  Cat rose from her chair to stand in front of Alex.  “About...K-Kara,” she choked out, taking Alex’s hands in hers.

 

Alex thought about being surprised, but she wasn’t.  Cat Grant was an award-winning journalist who specialized in seeking the truth and Kara was no great secret keeper.  Alex thought about denying it, but...what was the point anymore?

 

Alex nodded, willing herself not to cry again.  “Thank you, Cat.  Please...please just make sure she’s honored the way she deserves.”

 

“I felt like Supergirl was my own hero, and Kara...she was...extremely special,” Cat replied, her voice catching.  “There’s no one I’ll ever honor more.”

 

Satisfied, Alex squeezed Cat’s hands, let them go, and turned on her heel to find J’onn.

 

A shocked and awed bullpen watched through the transparent windows as the mysterious agent left and Cat Grant openly began to weep.

 

* * *

  


**_In a Last Heroic Act, Supergirl Makes the Ultimate Sacrifice for National City_ **

 

**“Supergirl is reported to have been lost to the cosmos after offering her life up in exchange for our safety.  Wherever she is, we can only hope she knows the gratitude and enormous loss we all feel.”**

 

As the media began to pour out eulogies for Supergirl, including highlight reels of all the rescues she had made, small and great, the citizens of National City began to pour out of their homes and lined the streets.  The sun set and a million candles lit up like a grounded constellation as blocks of people held vigils.  Little girls cried against their mothers’ waists.  Police officers and firefighters stood with their hats in their hands.  TV screens scanned across the country as Metropolis darkened its bright lights, the Empire State Building shone red and blue, and flags all over flew at half staff.  The love Kara left behind shook the whole nation.

 

Alex was gazing at her own constellations.  J’onn had offered the courtesy of flying her out to Midvale and when Eliza saw her, she opened her arms and Alex fell into them.  She failed at the one thing her parents had been telling her to do since she was fourteen and she thought her mother would be cold, but Eliza held her for hours before she was finally ready to let go.

 

After her mother had gone to bed, Alex climbed up to where she used to watch the stars with Kara.  She remembered the constellations that were new to Kara that she could show her, and when Kara had pointed to where she calculated Rao was.

 

_“On Krypton, I had an aunt who would tell me all the names of the stars.  She loved the stars...she was even named after them,”_ Kara had told her, smiling fondly.  She met the famous Astra later...and killed her, go figure.  Alex wondered if Kara had ever really forgiven her before she…god, Kara Danvers, Kara Zor-El would never even get a real funeral.  Just Supergirl.  How was that fair?

 

Alex watched as a fast, bright shooting star crossed the dark horizon.  It was beautiful.

 

_And of course Kara’s not here to see it.  Just me.  Alone._

 

Suddenly the darkness felt darker, and Alex couldn’t look at the stars any longer.  

 

* * *

  


Everything hurt.

 

* * *

  


“Director Lane....no, I did not see it, I’ve been a bit busy with the loss of an asset and friend, thank you...yes, that’s quite wonderful, yet I fail to see how this is DEO business...what?...you’re absolutely sure?...and viable?...oh my...yes, we’ll send transport immediately.”

 

* * *

  


J’onn had told her to stay in Midvale, but Alex was too devoted to her job to risk leaving her agency alone at its most vulnerable moment.  Before the sun was up and Eliza awakened, she took her mother’s car and drove back to National City.  She’d have to apologize later.

 

“Agent Danvers, you should not be back here so soon,” Lucy told her when Alex walked in.

 

“Luce...it’s really better that I keep myself busy,” Alex sighed.

 

Lucy nodded, and after a hesitation, took Alex up in a hug.  “I wanted it to wait until things had improved but...there’s something you need to see.”

 

Alex looked at her quizzically, but Lucy took her hand and led her to the med bay.

 

On that table, surrounded by sun lamps, with chapped skin and raked scratches and pooled bruises but very much alive, was Kara.

 

Alex stifled a cry and gasped at Lucy.  “How?”

 

“NASA,” Lucy began, “some astronomers were watching the sky last night and they saw an unexpected single meteor fall...or at least, that’s what they thought.”

 

Alex stared at her unconscious sister, literally now a shooting star.

 

“When they found her, they reported directly to our liaison and he called me.  I couldn’t believe it either.  I was hoping she could heal from...this, before you saw her, but since you’re here I couldn’t let you spend another moment thinking she was gone.”

 

“Thank you, Lucy,” she whispered.

 

“Well, go on and see her, Danvers,” Lucy smiled.  “I think she’d like to wake up with you there.”

 

The damage to Kara’s body was worse than anything Alex had seen on her before and the sight make her choke back a sob.  She supposed this was what happened when a superhero literally fell from outer space.

 

She took Kara’s limp hand and rubbed it gently with her thumb.  “I’m not leaving you, Kara.  Please come back.”

 

* * *

 

It took two days and multiple terrible sleeping positions for Alex on a chair next to that table,, but Kara listened.

 

“Alex?”

 

She shot her head up.  “Kara!”  She moved to hug her but drew her arms back frantically, not knowing what to do with them.  Kara’s skin had smoothed out and the bruises and cuts were nearly gone, but Alex was afraid all the same.

 

“What happened, Alex?” Her voice was just above a whisper.

 

“You saved the world, Kara,” Alex breathed out, smiling, but it faltered.  “But I didn’t save you.”  She paced away from Kara, feeling the blood drain from her face.

 

“But Alex…” Kara moved to sit up through grimaces of pain.  “I’m alive.  I mean, I never expected to survive but I’m here,” she proclaimed, trying to smile.

 

“By luck,” Alex replied dully.  “I failed to protect you.  As far as the world knows, you’re dead.”

 

“You didn’t fail at all Alex, I rigged the system!  I wasn’t supposed to live.  I was prepared to die.  You can’t feel like this is your fault.”

 

“Then why do I feel so ashamed to face you, Kara?” Alex asked quietly, turning back to her sister.

 

“Because this is the one time you couldn’t save me from myself,” Kara sighed, “and you felt powerless.  I did that to you, Alex.  I’m the one who ought to be sorry.”

 

“Kara--”

 

“But I’m not.  I would make the sacrifice to protect this planet again and again.  And all those things I said to you, I meant.  I really do want you to have your own life, free from the chains my existence here put on you.”

 

“You dumb alien,” Alex chuckled.  “Don’t you know any life of mine without you would have a giant Kara-shaped hole in it?”  She took her sister’s hand.  “I love that you’re a hero with a heart of gold, but I’m a little more selfish than that.”

 

“Selfish is not a word for Alex Danvers,” Kara laughed and smiled at Alex.  “I can’t promise never to make this kind of choice again,” she admitted, “but I’ll try not to leave you in the dark next time, okay?”

 

Alex nodded.  “Okay.”

 

She saw Kara smile, and she knew the sky would be one star brighter tonight.

  
  
  



End file.
